Communicate Better
Better yet, the art of Communication.
When we realize that each person functions from a different set of beliefs, memories, values, and experiences
(and therefore drawing their map of reality differently than our own), we must honor the fact that people are
looking through different lenses and creating different realities.
Conversations filled with positioning of who is right or wrong or with armoring for the next attack, will always
lead to destroyed relationships and fractured families, organizations and teams. The success destined individual,
however, knows that by mastering flexibility of perception, she can more authentically honor the unique
perspectives of those around her. She can comfortably hold authentic conversations filled with skillful and artful
questions. This skill is the cornerstone of continued success in life.
Each of our realities is just as valid as any other person’s, so we require to learn and master the art of
flexibility. We require to learn how to enter conversations with the primary intent to understand and empower our
relationships while maintaining appropriate boundaries for ourselves. When we enter our conversations with this
conscious intention, we can master the art of flexibility and increase our ability to hold authentic conversations,
boosting our influence and increasing our own self esteem.
For example, what would your reality be like if you made a pact with yourself to simply stop talking ill of
anyone? Try it. Find the highest thing you can say about one another and speak to that. Hold your highest thought
for one another even if the other person’s behavior is disappointing to you. The results of this simple exercise
are remarkable, remarkable both for you personally and for everyone you touch.
Principles of the Win-Win Conversation
Strengthen and leverage your relationships with these strategies for effective communication.
1. Be in physiological rapport with the other person. 2. Enter the conversation with the
intention to clarify and enrich. 3. Also enter with the intention to empower yourself and the other
person equally. 4. Authentically desire a win-win from the conversation. 5. Be
accountable for your part in the situation. 6. Be fully and completely present with the other
person. 7. Know that you are creating your own emotional responses and that you have a choice.
Perspective Shifting and Finding the Harmony
Ask yourself these questions to establish the intention and outcome for any conversation and steer yourself away
from pitfalls that are most commonly entered when two people are seeing through two different lenses.
1. What am I not seeing? 2. Where is my attention? 3. Where am I not being
realistic? 4. What could be the positive intention of the other person? 5. How
could I look at this differently? 6. How many different perspectives can I take to give me
clarity? 7. What is present when I’m at my best? 8. What part of the solution am
I? 9. Where might I be in denial? 10. What am I afraid of here, and is it real?
11. What are my false assumptions? 12. Who am I when I speak and act from my
heart? 13. What changes will I affect when I show up as who I really am? 14. What
is it to be a leader? 15. What am I grateful for in this situation? 16. What is
the one thing that I require to say to bring resolution? 17. What am I teaching myself in this
situation?
We require to utilize all of the skills available to us such as accountable perception, positive
intention, and the ability to create rapport at the subconscious level. By creating this type of environment of
safety and trust, we can sustain our happiness and be a light to those who surround us.
Contact us at: (818) 551-1501 to help you feel better!

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